Dealing with Conflict (Rom. 12:8-19)

One of your leaders says something to you about an idea he doesn't support.  It's not that you demand uniformity, but his comment sounds like a backdoor threat.  If he doesn't get his way, he won't be a part of it.  If he doesn't get his way, he might leave. You didn't see THAT coming!  You scratch your head and wonder, "What?"  What did you do to deserve such a response?  Welcome to conflict!  It happens frequently to Christian leaders.  If you don't accidentally find conflict, conflict will intentionally find you.  I promise.

Here is some wisdom from Romans 1:8-19.  The context isn't necessarily conflict, but the principles are helpful.

• Lead diligently (12:8).  Don't interpret an attack on one thing as a referendum on your leadership as a whole.
• Love sincerely (12:9-10).  Treat people as people, not as adversaries or inconveniences or production units. 
• Live fervently (12:11-12).  Maintain spiritual zeal.  Build a strong soul.  Cultivate joy, patience and faithfulness.  Watch your heart.
• Engage personally (12:13-16).  Don't shut down, shut out or shut away.  Stay engaged with people.  Take the high ground.
• Forgive continually (12:17-19).  Forget getting even or proving that you're right.  Remember you chose to forgive.  The six hardest words might be "I don't have to be right."

Just because I am right in my idea doesn't mean I am right in my approach.  Just because I am right in my idea doesn't mean I am right in my heart.  Just because I am right in my idea doesn't mean I am right in my relationships.